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Fic: First Time

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Dec. 11th, 2010 | 07:38 pm

Title: First Time
Author: [info]heartsasmagnets 
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~600
Spoilers: None really.
Summary: Kurt's first time.
 

Kurt’s first time is nothing like he expects it to be. It just sort of happens one day without a great deal of fuss or conversation.

It’s not like porn, which up until now has been his only readily available reference for what to expect from sex.

His eyes are closed and he’s grinding – almost entirely clothed – hard against Blaine in the middle of one of their marathon makeout  sessions on Kurt’s bed when he feels Blaine’s hands wander underneath his shirt and up his back. Blaine’s warm lips maneuver from his own to his neck and finally to his earlobe, Blaine’s heavy breathing echoing loudly in his ear.

“Oh god,” Kurt moans, still writhing as he buries his face in Blaine’s shoulder.

This isn’t anything new. They’ve done this and more, but this time feels completely different; heightened to a new level of sexy, wonderful amazingness. Suddenly he feels two hands on his ass, pushing him down with even greater force. He frantically removes Blaine’s shirt, and tosses it aside, consumed with the desire to feel more, to taste more, and to somehow be even closer to him. His entire mental capacity is being expended processing sensations, so it’s not until Blaine’s voice breaks through the silence that he even begins to comprehend the reality of the moment.

“Please Kurt,” Blaine whispers.

Kurt lifts his head. Though their rhythm does not stop or change, he wills himself to keep his eyes open long enough to make eye contact. Even if he wanted to, how could Kurt refuse those eyes?  Those dark, wide, hungry eyes that lock onto his, tell him more than any conversation ever could.

Kurt knows three things; that he is incomprehensibly in love with Blaine, that Blaine feels the same for him and that now is the right time to take this final step.

His first time is like thirty billion times better than porn had led him to believe.

It’s not as polished or seamless. Blaine has to help him with the condom, and his shaking hands nearly cause him to drop the lube, but it doesn’t matter that they’re inexperienced.

What matters is the way Blaine guides him and reassures him. What matters is the way his face contorts in a mix of pleasure and pain as Kurt pushes in little by little. What matters is that his fingernails dig into his back, making deeper and deeper marks with every inch. What matters is the gasps and groans they exchange when Blaine nods as approval for Kurt to finally move freely.

What matters is how perfect it feels to be inside of him and how he feels (and is) closer to Blaine than to any other human being ever.

Kurt comes grasping at Blaine’s broad shoulders and repeating a nearly indecipherable string of words which includes his name and several variations of moans followed by expletives.

When it’s over, there are no gushing declarations of love. He simply cleans up and returns to bed where he kisses Blaine a few more times before they fall asleep, their bodies fitted together as they were always meant to be.

It’s not a spectacular display of any sort, but it’s real and vulnerable – and it’s better than he ever imagined it could be.

 

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Comments {18}

Spite the Wufei Worshipper

(no subject)

from: spite_pet
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 01:51 am (UTC)
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First time Top!Kurt YAY! Awesome, awesome, awesome. ^___^

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UltraDeepField

(no subject)

from: blaqkheaven
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 02:15 am (UTC)
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AMAZING first time fic. A+++

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(Deleted comment)

Pandora

(no subject)

from: mimic_scorpio
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 02:23 am (UTC)
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I loved the sense of realism that was present throughout the whole fic. Nice work!;)

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Fabrisse

(no subject)

from: fabrisse
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 02:27 am (UTC)
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Oh, yes. Perfectly right.

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Library Alterna-Chick ;)

(no subject)

from: jedishadowolf
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 02:46 am (UTC)
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Oh lovely! very real and sweet

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Brobi Wan Kenobi

(no subject)

from: samsamtastic
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 03:08 am (UTC)
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I'm really, really in love with your top!Kurt. So very lovely, their progression felt natural and works so well!

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psychological liar

(no subject)

from: novelized
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 04:46 am (UTC)
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DAWWW you made porn cute how u do dis

<3333

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heartsasmagnets

(no subject)

from: heartsasmagnets
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 04:49 am (UTC)
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Do you really wanna know the secret?


Be a sappy virgin who fails at writing porn.

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psychological liar

(no subject)

from: novelized
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 04:50 am (UTC)
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HAHA you do not fail at all though

AT ALL

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heartsasmagnets

(no subject)

from: heartsasmagnets
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 05:00 am (UTC)
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LOL you can thank the internet for teaching me all I know.

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maplelump

(no subject)

from: maplelump
date: Dec. 15th, 2010 06:56 pm (UTC)
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That just tells me that I have a chance to be a great smut writer. VIRGIN POWER!! :P

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obsession called while you were out

(no subject)

from: flyingcarpet
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 06:21 am (UTC)
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Oooh, very nice. :)

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skintightsocks

(no subject)

from: skintightsocks
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 11:06 am (UTC)
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This was really sweet. ♥

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mod_squad7117

(no subject)

from: mod_squad7117
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 05:44 pm (UTC)
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"It’s not a spectacular display of any sort, but it’s real and vulnerable – and it’s better than he ever imagined it could be."

This may be an inappropriate reaction to porn, but, I seriously got misty eyed at your quiet and serene ending. I can't handle (in the best way!) how you're not writing porn but something deeper. You expose and comment on the rightness of them together; on their making a world with and for each other--no one else.

Your use of "what matters" in repetition makes the prose mirror their feelings by limiting us to this world. Your repetition makes *their* world real, vivid and true by bringing *that* into focus over the act taking place. Long comment is long because this resonated so deeply with me. It's a little world perfectly crafted.

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heartsasmagnets

(no subject)

from: heartsasmagnets
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 10:35 pm (UTC)
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The fact that it's not porn is the whole point. I'm glad you got it. Kurt's only experienced the unreality (that's not even a word) but until now, so when he experiences sex for real, he's not focusing on the mechanics of it -- all the things he's seen over and over again. He's focused on what makes his first time so much different than porn.

As usual, you understood perfectly. <3 I look forward to your comments every time.

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Bettina Dawes

(no subject)

from: mothergoddamn
date: Dec. 12th, 2010 10:52 pm (UTC)
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Ohh, thank you for the hot fic and the layout I just totally stole!

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panbutnotpeter

(no subject)

from: panbutnotpeter
date: Dec. 13th, 2010 10:35 am (UTC)
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Guh, so sweet. I love the idea that Kurt -- who is unapologetically theatrical and eats up grand gestures -- is so in love with Blaine that he doesn't need to make losing his virginity a big deal, and that what they have is so real and so permanent that it was just the natural thing to do, and when it was over they didn't act like it was any other night because that's the way things were always meant to be between them.

Basically: hearts in my eyes.

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